Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Can you be another X-man?
From the time, I was smart enough to understand things then I used to find why all like the unique ones and what make them so unique. During the lifeline, I was a fan of someone or the other and would try to be like them. I was in third and a great fan of He-man and would wish to be similar to him. I thought the sword He-man possesses is something that makes him unique and thus I insisted my father to purchase one. I was in Fourth and found that all like my friend Abhinav. I tried to imitate him in the way he speaks and the way he writes. I reached high school and then I found that either studious people or singers/dancers are the ones whom public (including girls ;) ) like. I was not good at singing neither dancing thus I made my way to studies. However, I was still no unique.
It was on a sunny day and I was on the ground in front of my house, playing cricket. The houses are located on sides of the road that creates a square shape with the playground in between. The streets connect to the end where another series of house and playgrounds/ gardens start. I was batting and was on the pitch for a long time scoring two and 4’s with not out. Robin arrived after the umpire declared the third player out. Robin started hitting four and six and in three over was LBW. He was in the field for a limited period but he received more claps than I could have received playing the entire match. I understand that people are not interested in a player who stays for long, scoring runs but in a player who hits six and four and thus make them happy. I started adopting it but it did not work long.
I thus left the hunt to be someone else as nothing worked for me. It was a drawing competition organized for ninth standard students and all were invited to participate. Ruchi Shah was a good painter and always praised by the teachers. She was the topper in the class and a good artist. She used unique skills of brushes and blades to get a creative look to each picture she made. I knew she will win and I can never draw as she does. However, I decided to participate as my mother convinced me saying that it is not important as to who wins but who participates. I practiced an astronaut that I saw in the science book I borrowed from my friend. I started working on the astronaut and made several alterations in the design and the pattern. I was happy that at least I am fighting not to win but to be a part of the match.
I started drawing the astronaut and did not turn around to see what others were drawing, as I feared I would be the worst in the queue that has children from the entire city. All were asked to wait as the winners will be announced and participation certificates will be distributed. I asked my father that we have to wait to receive the participation certificate. The judge started declaring results and I was looking at Ruchi’s face watching her expressions on the results. She was nowhere in the fourth, third and second place. I was sure that she would be the first and all teachers were looking proudly at her expecting her appreciation. The judge then declared “and finally the first prize goes to Abhilash M. Pillai of St. Xaviers High school for his painting depicting an astraunaut”. I was shocked as others and felt as if my entire body was empty of blood. Face was pale and my heart started beating like never when the judge asked me to come on the stage. I went on the stage and shook hands with the judge. My hands were shivering and cold. For the first time in my life, I saw people clapping for me.
Ruchi Shah did not cry like the ordinary girls but she was sad at not winning the competition. She was a good-looking woman with a height at least 5 inches more than I was and her brain was 10 times working more during day and night. My mother was happy who was tired at scolding me every time for not scoring high in the exams and never completing my home works.
I do not say that I won all the drawing competitions that were organized later. However, I understood that I cannot be another person, a x-man just by imitating them and all that matters is how people see me and not how they see me in others costumes.